Oh, Rowe!

Rowe is such a doll.  She never fails to crack me up!  Not sure if Peter is feeling the same way right now.  Rowena will not leave her poor Daddy alone! :(  He hangs out with her SO much, yet it's still not enough.  She'll stand at the top of the stairs on the second floor or at the bottom of the steps in the basement and just says..."Come on, Dad, come on!"  And, if he doesn't get to her right away...she keeps it up, a little louder, and more frequently.  She's just so damn cute.  I really wish her vocabulary would increase, as it's so difficult to understand her wants and needs right now, especially because she knows what she wants, she just can't articulate it.

Rowe, I ask that you try a little harder to use real words.  I have heard you answer Dora in perfect Spanish and wonder why it is that you refuse to talk to your family members in English.  And, please, I beg of you...give Daddy a break.  He really deserves a little down time!  Until then, I will enjoy all of your chubby cuteness...

Enjoying the First Snow Fall of the Season

Starting very early on Saturday morning, like around midnight, it began snowing...and continued throughout the night and well into the day.  The girls couldn't wait to go out and play in the accumulated snow.  It was gorgeous out.  Getting up around 3:30 a.m. isn't always the most fun thing to do, but as I sat nursing Charlie, I really enjoyed my coffee and watching the gorgeous snow falling onto the ground.  It really helps get me into the Christmas Spirit!

Here are pictures of the girls enjoying the first snow fall of the year...

Katie supporting her Uncle's show

 Rowena getting into snow gear for the first time

 She was not a fan of trying to walk in the snow with all that gear on

 Trying to make some sort of fort...I think they gave up shortly after the picture (Katie is in the middle with Spencer and Gwen).

 The girls really enjoyed the sleigh rides with Peter as the "horse"

 Rowe LOVED it and kept signing for more

 Trying to get Curt with some snowballs...but he caught almost every single one!

 Riggs and Baxter LOVED the weather!

 Making snow angels

 They did this throughout the day, everyone taking turns pulling and riding.

Our Christmas Angel

On Sunday we had a surprise guest stop by our home.  It was a man and woman whom I had never seen or met before.  I opened the door and said "Hi."  She simply asked, "I can see that you're busy, so this we won't stay long.  Is this the home of Amy and her family?"  When I responded "Yes," the couple handed me a wrapped box and said "Merry Christmas!"  I wasn't sure what to do or say, other than "Thank You" so that is what I said, and how the meeting was concluded.

As they walked away, and I shut the door, I didn't know what to think.  Who are these strangers?  How do they know my name?  And, what is this box?  It had no card on the outside, just wrapped in a Christmas plaid with a red bow. I handed it to Peter, and he opened it.  It was a very festive Christmas box with Santa or a snowman on it.  Again, Peter opened.  Inside the box was a letter and three more small boxes and a small envelope.  This is the letter:

And, in the boxes were several gift cards.  Gift cards to a grocery store, a local gas station, Wal-Mart, and Toys R Us.  I couldn't believe it.  Peter and I stood there shocked.  Tears streamed down my face.  They still do whenever I think about it. 

We are completely clueless as to where this came from, who is this angel who sent this wonderful and VERY generous gift?  Was it a group of people?  A church?  An individual?  They specifically said "Amy and family" at the door.  Although the letter stated they (or he/she) would like to remain anonymous, I am constantly trying to figure it out.  We want to thank you, whoever you are, for your thoughtfulness, your kindness, your generosity.  We are overwhelmed with graditude and wish to thank you a million times over.  This gift will be so unbelievably useful during this time for us! 

We have been surrounded by so much support and love from so many since Peter lost his job in August.  Although it has been a struggle, we have become stronger because of it.  We have taken advantage of spending a lot of time together, being with our children.  We both continue to look for jobs, although I have two very part time jobs (working at GSU for Dr. Dermer for up to 300 hours and on Mondays at a private practice), it is not cutting it.  We're hoping things turn around after the New Year.  And, once we are back on our feet, we will pay-it-forward...

So...

To our

Christmas Angel...

whoever and where-ever you are...

THANK YOU SO VERY MUCH...

your generosity and thoughtfulness has not gone unnoticed.  We truly appreciate it all...you have no idea how much you have done and how much you have touched our lives and hearts!

Our Family of Six

Definitely not the best picture, but it's our first picture as a family of six...

 The kids having fun together...

Charlie's First Week

Well, let me start by saying how FAST this week went! Whoa.  I know that I'm totally jumping ahead here, but before we know it he'll be a month old, a year old, starting kindergarten...It just all happens so fast.  A day here and there might seem drag on, but all of a sudden--BAM!  You have a 7 year old.  Can you believe...Delaney will be 7 on Sunday.  Yikes.

Charlie has had a fun and exciting first week.  We came home on Tuesday around 1:30 or so, and Charlie had his first "babysitter" that night.  Poppy watched him and Rowena while we went to Delaney's first grade performance, where the girls were cats and boys were dogs:

The rest of the week, we spent at home, just chillin and getting used to having four children, some more needy than others, and establishing a routine. We have noticed that Katie is wanting me more since Charlie's arrival, and Rowe is still attached to Peter.  All of the girls are great with Charlie and have been big helpers.  Rowe loves to check on him, share toys (and food and juice), and throw diapers away.  When I really need something, Delaney and Katie are both right there, willing to pitch in a helping hand.  They've been terrific. 

 

Charlie got to see snow fall for the first time this weekend, although, he will not partake in the snow fun this year.  The girls had a great time (will post on that later).  Nana also came to visit...we think she brought the snow with her from Iowa, for which I am grateful (yes, I LOVE snow).  Nana's visit was a fun and very relaxing one.  She treated us to every meal while she was here, so we ate really well and have leftovers to enjoy as well.  Rowe has really expanded on her words and would walk around the house looking for "Nananana." 

 

Charlie got a lot of new and gently used clothes his first week.  Nana and Grammie purchased a ton of new clothes.  A friend's cousin gave us a huge garbage bag full of boys' clothes as she had two boys and is now done with kids.  Our friends (Julie and Brian) who had tiny twins last December lent us all of their boy new born sized clothes and a few new outfits for Charlie.  They also gave us some food---YUMMY smoked pulled pork and two huge trays of baked mac-n-cheese.  The Osberghaus' stopped by on Saturday and gave each of the girls a gift--hair brushes and clips and such, and Charlie got about 4 outfits from them.  Andrea, a former co-worker of Peter, stopped by the morning after Charlie was born (in the hospital) and gave us some Bears onesies and a NB outfit.  Thank you SO much everyone!  I feel like I've been doing laundry all weekend...ahahahha.  Actually, I have been!  But, that's okay.  I appreciate everyone's generosity and Charlie is always dressed so cute. 

He has a lot of NB-sized clothes which is great because he's only weighing 6 lbs, 13 oz right now and the 0-3 month clothes are way too big on him.  He really gets lost in them!  And, he goes through 1-5 outfits a day, so I'm loving the amount of NB clothes we have for him.  I think I'll be doing laundry every day now with his clothes and Rowe's cloth diapers.  I'm not using cloth on Charlie yet because the smallest diapers we have are for 10-25 lbs...there's no way that will work on our little guy.

Oh, Charlie also had his first doctor's appointment this weekend.  On Saturday he got to meet Dr. Paul.  At almost 1 week, Charlie is still 5 oz under his birth weight.  He has another appointment on Wednesday for a re-weigh.  Dr. Paul said he looks great, no jaundice-phew, and his circ is looking great.  I'm hoping his cord will fall off soon, and then we can give him "real" baths.  Charlie currently hates baths, but he's so darn tiny and skinny, he just freezes since we can't let him just relax in the warm water (gotta keep that cord dry).

Last night, well, yesterday afternoon, we went over to Grammie and Poppy's.  It was the first time the whole family of SIX went for a ride together.  A little crazy, I have to say.  I might have to concede on our next car purchase and (wince, gulp) get a minivan (shudder).  Our Freestyle is looking a little cramped and I have NO idea how we will pack for long trips.  We'll get it down though...and I don't think we're going anywhere far away anytime soon.

Home Sweet Home, Charlie

On Tuesday, Charlie was allowed to come home.  His billirubin level had climbed at the following 12-hour testing intervals: 1.6 (birth)-3.6 (12 hours)-5.6 (24 hours)-7.2 (36 hours).  The peditrician discharged him, telling us to keep an eye on him, make sure he's eating and pooping, and to follow up in one week.

So, Peter came back to the hospital, and around noon, we were on our way home.  Charlie did well, despite how cold the car felt.  It was a long ride home (in comparison to the girls' first ride home which was about 5 minutes). 

We got home and Katie screamed in delite!  Katie and I went shopping to get him some clothes, seeing as I have about 10 gender neutral outfits, and only pink blankets...see what I mean.  That's a boy underneath that pink blanket on me.  (This picture was taken Wednesday morning)

Charlie is adjusting well to life as a Henderson.  He has been sleeping well, cries seldomly (hopefully I didn't speak/type too soon), and eats like a champ.  He seems so super small to me.  He has long, skinny legs.  He cries when we change his diapers, and I think it's because the poor guy gets so cold.  I love the newborn clothes that were purchased and lent to us; they fit him so well, while the 0-3 month clothes just swim on him right now.  I'm sure by Christmas he'll have grown into those.

The girls love him.  Rowe has to make sure she knows where he is all the time. She tried to give him a bottle this morning, and wanted to share her dry cereal with him the other day.  Delaney is pretty sweet and continually calls him Charles.  Katie has lost some interest in him, but I think it's because she still wants the attention and time.  She is very nice and sweet with him.  I plan to take more pictures this weekend when (hopefully) things aren't so hectic.

In the meantime...here are some shots of Charlie during his first couple days at home.

Meeting Riggs.  Riggs is pretty sweet.  He followed us around a lot on Tuesday while we carried Charlie. And, if Charlie is in the baby papasan, Riggs lays down right next to him.

 Sleeping so peacefully

Getting ready for his first bath at home...which he hated.  I think he might have been too cold.  Poor guy!

Emotional Roller Coaster...The Postpartum Joys

I love children.  I love having children.  I love being pregnant.  Yes, I absolutely LOVED being pregnant...every time.  I have never had a "bad" pregnancy where I feel horrible or am vomitting daily.  Yeah, I got sick here and there, but nothing major or unbearable.  At the end of each pregnancy, yes, I got uncomfortable, but I was never the one to say "I can't wait to be done with this pregnancy."  It might have helped that three of our four children were born more than two weeks early.

Well, after the birth of a baby, a woman can go through a wonderful emotional roller coaster that is due to the hormone surge after birth.  I'll admit, I'm struggling right now.  I couldn't wait to get home yesterday; bring Charlie home to his house and family.  About 20 minutes after I got home, I needed peace and quiet.  It felt like I walked into a tornado, things everywhere, choas, out of control.  I was just plain overwhelmed.  I can't remember what time it was, but I looked at Peter and burst into tears and just said "I don't even know what to do.  I'm so overwhelmed."  Now, let me add that it probably didn't help that not even 48 hours after giving birth, I was running errands and shopping (what?  He's our first boy and is still wrapped in pink...he needs some things!).  I think I overdid it a little and was not feeling well physically, which didn't help me emotionally. 

We got home from the hospital around 1 or a little after.  Katie and I went shopping around 2 or so.  Delaney got off the bus around 4, and we went to her First Grade Performance around 6pm.  She did wonderful.  We had Poppy come over to watch Rowena and Charlie...too many people, too many germs, way too cold.  Delaney was even picked out of the entire group of first grade girls to say "Thank You" for those that helped put on the show and give them flowers and a hug.  I am SOOO proud of her!  She was picked because of how well she behaved during rehearsals.

We got home and Delaney needed to do homework, both Delaney and Katie needed baths, the dishes needed to be done, we promised pie and ice cream, Rowe is not used to not being carried by Peter when she wants him, Charlie was chillin' with Grammie.  It wasn't that unusual of a day, in that we know our routine with the girls so very, very well.  But, you throw in an infant that needs to eat so often, be changed even more often, etc. and you still want to keep up with your routine and the attention your other children need and want so much...and crash...I burst into tears.  I don't think I have postpartum depression...I honestly believe I'm overwhelmed and scared, and to be honest--I feel guilty.  I feel guilty that I can't play school with Katie because I have to feed Charlie.  I feel guilty because I'm completely exhausted and my body is worn out and I lose my patience with Delaney.  I feel guilty that Rowe won't hang out with me, but only wants Peter...like she knows I'm a bad parent.  And, I know I'm not, I really do.  But, I blame these postpartum hormones that drive women crazy.  I know it will pass.  I know in a few days or a couple weeks things will settle.  We'll become more used to Charlie being home and we will develop a new routine, and include everyone.

And, despite my tear bursts, my exhaustion, and my soreness...I am so sad that I will never again experience pregnancy, the kicks and squirms, the pain and excitement of labor, and having another baby.  But, I am so grateful to have found someone in my life for which we share the same values in parenting, and one who is so supportive and helpful and sticks by my side and hugs me and kisses my head when I am this overwhelmed.  I am grateful for my four healthy children that we do have, their different personalities that drive me crazy and that I love so very much. 

So, it's almost 4am and Charlie is taking a nap on me after only eating on one side and having a diaper change.  I am smelling his head as I type this, knowing how quickly this stage passes.  It's so very dark and quiet in our house right now and I just wanted to express how overwhelmed I have been, even though I know it will pass and we'll be just fine.  Right now, the choas has settled and I have peace and quiet and can rest...for about 3 more hours.  Do I sleep or do I take the moment???